My “aggravating factor” is getting bigger by the day. At 14 weeks I will soon switch to maternity garments, also known as tepees. Except that this time, instead of overpriced jeans and t-shirts tepees, I get to go on a shopping spree for business attire tepees. See, I am now a working woman, hear me roar. (Then catch my fancy pumps in a sidewalk crack and sprain my ankle. Or eat my sushi on a freshly painted bench. Yep, that’s me, classy all the way.)
The morning [afternoon-evening-night] sickness has mostly subsided thanks to a $200-a-month Diclectin habit, and has been largely replaced by an overwhelming urge to run to Costco and buy a sea container of fresh berries with a cubic ton of rice pudding. (Mmmm, rice pudding and fresh berries: one of the things that does not remind me of the pro-life / pro-choice dialogue).
In any case, I learned an interesting kernel of information yesterday at the pay office. Employees of the Public Service qualify for maternity leave benefits after 6 months of full-time work. I’m sure there’s a catch somewhere (like turning-in your newborn upon it’s 8th birthday to the salt mines) but I will have been working 6 months, hear this, 10 days before my due-date. Isn’t that hilarious? But even more hilarious is my husband’s commitment to bring me to work on a gurney to complete the 6 months requirement. If I give birth early — hopefully on a weekend — we hope that a strategically placed pillow will do the trick. A friend asked me if this was ethical, to which I replied: “I got a Master’s degree in ethics, therefore everything I do is ethical.” Hey, don’t shoot me: that’s how it seems to work in academia. If you doubt it, go and read anything written by Princeton’s Peter Signer or Oxford’s Julian Savulescu.
So for once, I’ll be hoping for a late delivery. The odds aren’t great: out of five, the three girls (who are indeed everything nice) were born early and the two boys (no comments) were late. But if you want to start a pool, feel free to send your donations to the pro-life organization of your choice.by